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You deserved that one hundred percent, you thieving bastard.

You're a moron. YDI.

You're a freaking idiot. :/ huge YDI.

That's what you get Wynonna

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA

Karma is a bitch, especially when mixed with stupidity.

YDI all the way

wow lolol you deserved that big time

Wow. Idiot. That's an FML for your mother having such a stupid child!

Thats what you get for trying to act cool dumbass

I automatically clicked YDI when I read "Today, I was at the mall shoplifting."

Idiot.

hahahah.
wow. how sad.

You sure do FAIL at shoplifting... maybe in jail they will teach you how to do it the right way... or google shoplifting for dummies..

Smart girl.
Stupid you.

That's what you get for stealing.

Haha, not only are you an ass for shoplifting, but you should have realized that they can't get you if you haven't admitted that you're shoplifting and you haven't left the store. They hire people to blend in an catch you in the act, should have known better.

You were SHOPLIFTING.

You deserved it.

Everyone has already said what i was going to say,
hope you have fun in jail, smartass.

Maybe you should get a JOB! This way you will have money to spend on yourself, and not steal to make yourself look cool. Cause in all actuality your still a loser!

You deserved it 100%.

http://www.livedispatch.org/facepalm.jpg

Ewww at least steal something worthwhile, like a TV.

ydiydiydddddddddddddiiiiiiiiii

YDI not for shoplifting but for admitting to it to a random person.

Learn to shoplift before shoplifting =/

Why would you even admit you did it to anyone you didn't know in the first place...

Shoplifting, really? Who over the age of 12 does that and thinks it's cool?

As for #26, your fiance just died and you're worrying about it getting posted on FML? Either you're a liar who is way more bored than the rest of us, or you have bigger issues and need to take your pity party somewhere else...like a therapist...

I completely agree that you deserved this. You steal, then try and post online how much your life sucks because you get caught? That's just stupid! Of course we aren't going to feel sorry for you since you were ROBBING THE PLACE. Fuck your low intelligence is more like it.

@ #26 I'm so sorry about your fiance. Sometimes the ones that really should be posted aren't, and the one's that are just stupid are (like this one). But I completely agree that people like this don't deserve space on this website.

wow. ydi for shoplifting in the first place.
and even if you thought she was a random girl. why would you admit to her that you stole them retard?
i hope you know the clothes arent as stylish in prison.

You are such a smart arse! Next time do yourself a favour, don't think with your willy!

Respect yourself and others.
Didn't anyone teach you?
YDI all the way.
Theif.

#26: I'm 50/50 about what you said, but if it's true, then yeah, I'm really sorry to hear that >_

Oops, comment got cut off.

#26: I'm 50/50 about what you said, but if it's true, then yeah, I'm really sorry to hear that x_x. I have posted 5 real FML's before about myself/family (one of them about my autistic brother), and they were all rejected as well. It seems the site and its users favour idiocy over real tragedies. That fact itself is pretty sad, but that's the North American culture, I suppose. People like to read about sex and stupid people, more than anything else.

Why would you admit to shoplifting to a stranger?

"Today, I was at the mall shoplifting-"

Stopped right there. You deserved it, you stupid twunt.

#26 - If what you said is true, I give you my sincerest condolences on your loss. However, the purpose of this site is for amusement and entertainment. Losing your fiancee, no matter how much it fucks up your life, is neither amusing nor entertaining. It is tragic, and anyone who gets any amusement out of it whatsoever deserves to burn in hell.

I HATE thieves and I think people like you should be in prison , you little fuck !
You deserve it and worse.

As for #26 : I also posted about my house getting flooded, but for some reason it also didn't get posted.
The reason for that I think is that the mods of this website only like funny things specially with a punch line in the end, which I and you didn't have.
Nothing funny about your fiance's death , sorry to hear that and I agree with you FYL.

I used to shoplift so much, so I can't blame you for that. However, YDI for accidentally telling the MANAGER that you stole them. Damn man, you are one dumb cunt! Gave me a good laugh though, I hope you don't do too much time, I heard juvies are even worse in the states.

I agree with #36.
I read the first 7 words and stopped 'cause I knew it was just going to end with you being a douche bag.
YDI

#26 (and also 34), while I'm sorry for your loss, this site is primarily an entertainment website. It's far easier to laugh at the idiocy of other people than actual tragedies. If you're looking for real sympathy you would probably have better luck elsewhere.

Wow. POOR YOU.
You fucking suck.

#41: Hm, well mine wasn't looking for sympathy. It was something about my autistic brother wanting to get his hair dyed, and my dad did not permit because he claims people who dye their hair are idiots and dropouts. My mom and I both had our hair dyed, while she is a RN (registered nurse) and I'm almost done with my BSc. I found that funny and ironic, no? But I guess I really am lacking the funny punchline there. =P

Then what happened? Did you return it or book it outta there?

#34: What's so North American about Europe? but I agree with your point about it being dumbed down. I think it's gotten to the point where half of the time I'm laughing and the other half of the time it's like reading a self-nominated Darwin Award honorable mention.

speaking of which...I hate to be the first to say it, just because the consequences might be mods hating me/my account, but who the hell is moderating this shit? Why over the past month or so have the number of terrible, silly (not funny/quaint), or illegal FMLs quadrupled? Honestly, is it just for shock factor?
I'm getting pretty irked when I look at this site for laughs or the occasional "ohhhhh!" but when will the "Today, I was cheating on my husband...," "Today, I with a prostitute...," "Today, I was shoplifting..." end? I don't think I'll be surprised if later this week we see "Today, I was murdering this innocent baby after killing his mother, but before I could get a stab in, a cop stops me! FML."
I demand it, bring back the funny :(

Ahahahahah youd be gutted, YDI for sure

tbh, it's a victimless crime

#26: This site is not meant to talk about stuff like that. The point of the site is to get a little laugh out of other people's stupidity and misfortunes and see that bad thing's don't only happen to you. Stuff like your fiance dying in a car crash (which is extremely sad, if true, and I give you my condolences) doesn't fit the site. It's too saddening.

Also OP is an idiot and should be removed from the gene pool.

i agree with #40... i stop reading after "shoplifting" and gave u a YDI... bloody thief

Moron. You really need to avoid breeding.

@47: And here's another moron. Shoplifting is not a victimless crime. You steal from the store, that's money being taken away from the company. They have to make it up somehow, which takes away from the company's workers, i.e people like YOU.

#26

It doesn't matter whether that story actually happened or not. It's not funny or entertaining. If anything, it's depressing.

That's why it's not been posted.

Idiot. YDI big time.

what are you 12? "she looked cool.." you deserved it, anyone shoplifting does.
if you're not 12, get a job you lazy jerk..

#34-you are stupid. The purpose of this site is to be funny, not to make somebody cry or feel bad about you. Have you not ever read an FML? You're retarded. Shut up. If you don't like it, leave. Nobody will care.

#43 that's not funny......at all. WOOOOOW.

this is the stupidest FML i've ever read. it fails on so many levels, i can't even believe it.

You're the stupid fucker who deserves to be drug out back behind the store and shot.

Seriously? First of all, shoplifting is just idiotic, and if you're going to do it, at least be SMART enough to not admit it to random people.

Omg my life is so bad. I stole from a store where the shirt was probably 20 bucks and then I admitted it. A guy in a mall cop uniform probably could've asked him and he woulda been like "yeah, ha did you steal that badge" fucking idiot.

Since when did being a douchebag asshole become cool?

just so you know, stores charge extra to make up for shoplifting. i'm not condoning the behavior, i'm just saying it's not like because this dumbass stole a shirt employees will be unable to put bread on the table for their families.

Police Blotter:

1:32 PM on Tuesday, burglary was reported at a clothing store. The criminal was apprehended inside the store. The store manager asked him if he was stealing clothes, and he replied, "yes".

Soooo deserved.

You may be the stupidest criminal I have heard about in quite some time... Don't steal things, it isn't cool... It doesn't make you "bad ass" it makes you an ass.

You completely deserved that. That's what you get for stealing.

Why the hell would you post something asking others to be sympathetic to you stealing?

Only losers steal

You deserved, you fucking idiot.

Wow. stealing is bad. But how stupid is it to admit it to a random person?
For your mother, who gave birth to such a douchebag, FHL.

Don't shoplift. YDI.

are you stupid?
yes.

how can ANYONE click "I agree, your life is f***ed" on this one?!

Here's a short story to advise you:
My brother stole chapstick from Walmart, presumably less than a dollar. He was caught and had to pay a $500 fine and he's not allowed back into Walmart. Essentially, he paid $500 for that chapstick, and he didn't even get to keep it.
Don't shoplift.

seriously? that's so dumb.

YDI for being a dumb ass.

Really?

o_o............there are no words for you stupidity. Like most of the people here, I stopped reading after shoplifting, clicked YDI and went on reading the rest of it. Still, YDI. Seriously, shoplifting was never cool. If you're that bored and that strapped for money, I'm sure there are other ways get things.

fuck you idiot!!

you make me sick.

I can't imagine any way this could be anything but your fault. Friggin' idiot.

Points to the manager, though. She must have gotten a kick out of getting an idiot to admit to stealing right there.

You are disgusting.

I hope you learned your lesson. You completely deserved that one.

http://images.starcraftmazter.net/4chan/for_forums/tactical_facepalm.jpg

I've been waiting for weeks for the perfect moment to deploy a Tactical Facepalm on someone. I think a stupid criminal story is appropriate.

Thanks.

...You are actually expecting people to believe this is an FML? You realise, by shoplifting, you drive up prices of items for the rest of us because the store must compensate for the merchandise you've gotten for free? D:.

FOL for having to pay for your dumb mistake. If you can't afford it, then don't buy it. It's not like you were stealing food because you're homeless and starving. You were stealing a shirt. Believe me, you can live without it.

your such a loser

not even a question dude, TOTAL YDI

You deserved this one.
Get a J.O.B.!! A.S.S.H.O.L.E

I hope you're posting this from jail, you little shit.

dumbass. how stupid can u get? YDI 110%

Well, she looked cool, how couls anyone cool be shoplifting? Well, I'm sure they don't hate you in that shop, you must've been the joke of the day. Go manager.

You're a tool. Pay for your shit and get a damn job.

Yup, you deserved whatever you got for that..even if you just had to return it to the shelf with humiliation. You weren't in the least bit suspicious when some random person asks you? Really dumb.

BTW, Shoplifting is not "cool" in the least, it's actually quite shameful. I shoplifted quite a bit when I was younger, but it was because I was broke as fuck and wasn't getting parental hand-outs like a lot of my friends were. I got away with it but I hope to never do it again.

You deserved this 3000%, I hope you sit in jail for some time too. One you don't need to steal to get things, as everyone else has said, GET A JOB! Two, never assume someone is shoplifting just because they're wearing something sold at that store, guess what, if it's not exclusive to that store, THERE ARE OTHER STORES THAT HAVE IT! Duh... plain idiocy at it's best. Anyone who says this is fucked up is just as culpable as you are because they are encouraging illicit behavior.

you. are. dumb. YDI all the way!

YDI

for all of u guys saying this doesnt deserve to be on this website, it rly should be but under the "flop" section. i mean its a funny story, i got a good laugh out of this idiot; and yes YDI completely.

DESERVED. IT.

No exceptions.

You deserved that one hundred percent, you thieving bastard.

lol, fucking idiot. Shoplifting is definitely a girl thing post-childhood. Then again you should be treated like a child considering you're not mature enough to follow the concept of paying for things one wants.

Wow. You're an idiot. I can't even come up with anything better or more fitting than those three words. I hit YDI the second I saw 'I was shoplifting'.

Jeesh really, how much of a moron do you have to be?

what the fuck has FML come to, when shit like this ends up here.
WHO THE FUCK IS MODERATING THESE POSTS?

ps- everyone who is putting up sob stories, get the fuck over it because this site isn't for people to feel bad for you, it's so people can laugh at you. do you really want people to laugh at your dead fiance or your mentally challenged brother?
assholes.

You're one dumb criminal.

@73, they click it because his life actually is f***ed, regardless of whether or not its his fault or if he deserved it

you deserve that all the way, idiot

Girls don't think it's sexy to shoplift... it means you don't have a job, you like to leech off other people without working for anything yourself, and that you are incapable of being mature. I suggest you try another tactic to win over the ladies.

if you were shoplifting because you needed food and were seriously in the gutter broke and economic times were hard etc., id understand. but if you were shoplifting for vanity's sake, YDI.. which is exactly wat u were doing and dont tell yourself anything otherwise.

i seriously doubt you were going to sell that shirt to buy milk and bread for your family.

and btw, u never admit to shoplifting anywhere near the vicinity of the store. dont be stupid. if ur gona commit a crime, dont talk about it. it's the quickest way to getting arrested.

Wow, lazy, immoral and stupid. You're a real catch.

"she seemed cool" ... youre a fucking idiot.

why is stealing shit "cool"?

I haven't thought of a way to spin shoplifting for sexual benefits.

Until we do, shoplift only from the ugly chicks.

oh you're cool. did you actually think you would get any sympathy or laughs when you started out with, "i was at the mall shoplifting"? what is wrong with you?

your an idiot... go play in traffic

Definitely more of a "F, I'm stupid" than a FML.

So, you tried to pick up a chick while shoplifting...lmao...i wish she would have led you on a bit more before she made you feel like such a dumb shit...

go get a job egoistic #%$@&

"yeah, i stole this.. you steal those pants you're wearing?"
wtf, who even says that? pants? ahaha. idiot.

I hope you get arrested. What is WRONG with you? Why do you think you have the right to steal? What is WRONG with your brain that makes you think this? You need to be in a lab, being studied. It's the only way you will provide a valuable contribution to society.

*slaps hand on forehead*

what were you thinking?!

That's what you get for being a self-centered asshole. Grow up and get a job. Learn to pay for your shit like the rest of us.

People like you are worthless pieces of shit. I hope you rot in jail for the rest of your life, but sadly with the current system you will probably get a fucking slap on the wrist.

all i had to read was 'i was at the mall shoplifting' to click on 'you deserved that one'

Wow, you're just... the biggest fucking idiot I've ever heard. Have fun in jail.

I moderated an FML one time that this reminded me of. The guy went to rob a liquor store, only to find it already robbed. He returned to his car to find that stolen as well.
But that one was funny, and a little depressing. Your's is just stupidity, at it's best.

Wow, I hope they put you away. There is no place in society for people like you.

"Today, I realized not only am I a pathetic shoplifter who can't get a job to buy some s$%t, but I also readily admit that i am to anyone who asks, especially store managers. FML"

Good job. I hope it goes on your record..then you REALLY won't be able to get a job.

You're an idiot.

Wow, you've chosen quite the road to go on in life... you are an idiot and wasted your time in posting this... unless you get off on people pointing out your stupidity or something...

Asshole. I clicked "you deserved that one" before I finished reading the first sentence.

Why would you post that story on fml? You couldn't have thought people were going to think your life is fucked. Your mind is fucked.

hahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaa

Deny, Deny, Deny! Don't think your big sh*t admitting to stealing. Always deny it. Deny it to the point where even YOU think you bought those jeans legitimatley.

um WTF!! we all have to pay for our clothes, why shouldn't you!!!

WOAH!!!!!!!!!!! everybody shutup. he doesnt fucking deserve it.

some ppl, start shop lifting cuz they can, its easy, and cheap, and retail stores suck at stopping it. seriously they almost hand you the clothes. friends start doing it and show you how easy it is and then you start doing it and cant stop... and some people are fucking poor. they still wanna look the same as everyone tho

the only reason YDI is cuz you need to check out who all is working b4 you take anything. walk casually thru the store looking at who is working. then you can take shit.

BTW if you would have said "no i didnt take anything" they could not have checked your bag if the bag was not from their store... they could have only called security or the cops... thats when you leave because they cant chase you out the door. their not allowed to

they get fired for checking your bags from other stores and chasing you out the door. technically their not even supposed to accuse you of stealing because now you have the right to sue them if you weren't. Try making it look like you stole something. let them see. have them accuse you and sue their ass....

next time just be smart about it....

Also agree with 131

and you don't go to fucking jail and it doesn't get put on your fucking record. chill the fuck out. if he went to jail he would have said so....

he was still in the store.... so all he had to do was give it back. he didnt even walk out of the store yet..... dumb asses

Don't steal of course. But it's always a pisser-offer when you see a lady who looks nothing like a manager or an employee and find out that she is, the hard way too.

fucking dumbass dont steal it wouldn't have happened lol hope u got some jail time for that lol

Not that you should be shoplifting in the first place, but YDI for trying to "look cool" and ever telling her. Show off! Thats what u get! ha! LMAO @ #88

Everyone hates people like this. Grow up and stop wasting everyone's money and time, including your own.

Fuck.

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fuckmylife431413, you too should go play in traffic. Who the hell tries to justify shoplifting? Only juvenile retards. GTFO and learn some spelling and punctuation. It won't kill you.

haha you idiot! Well done =P

you are stupid.

You're stupid.
YDI.

oh well, they've pretty much said it all - stupid act, YDI

you should have left it like this "Today, I was at the mall shoplifting. I then realized that I'm a pathetic asshole. FML."

when you posted this fml, did you honestly think you wouldnt get all ydi's?!

"Today I was at the mall shoplifting...".

Wrote like it was your weekly routine.

What a loser

Did you actually expect to get sympathy for this? You're a fucktard.

OP and #133: Go. To. Hell.

@147: EXACTLY. Thank you. :)

I've never actually left a comment on the internet before in my life, and I may never again, but this deserves one.

You, sir, are a buffoon. YDI.

why would you even tell someone you shoplifted?

ydi & your life sucks

WOW! You are a fucking idiot!
100% deserved it! I cannot believe how stupid you are!
Why would you ever post this on FML? Did you think someone would have sympathy for this?!

you're a dumb ass
get a job and buy things.

PWND.

why would you ever admit to stealing to a complete strangerrr .. lets be SERIOUS.

Stealing huh? Yeah, there's no ifs, ands, or buts, about this one. You deserved it.

Here's to hoping they fined you for lots of money! Maybe even gave you a few days in jail? :D :D :D One can always be optimistic.

everyone else said it but I'm going to say it again.
your a fucking idiot.

fucking retard

If that doesn't make you stop shop lifting then I don't know what will.

ahahaha idiot

we can thank you for the econmy failing.

ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL and no #164 there is no excuse for stealing

I'm surprised you still had time to post this.

Why is this a FML? You deserved it 100%. I hope you got arrested too.

People still shop lift?

LOL! i did the same as #10

Yeah... You deserved that one.

Sorry, I hate it when pepole steal :/

hah, wow, you completely deserved that one.

Are you guys seriously doing this? While I agree that this person was acting in a foolish and immoral manner, and that they got exactly what they deserved, I cannot believe so many people are blaming him/her for the dowfall of the economy. Really? Really?! You believe that shoplifting is the reason our financial situation is so dire? Are you insane? And to whoever posted comment #120; do you honestly think it would be fair for someone to go to jail for LIFE because they tried to steal a shirt? Are you that insensitive? And to the poster of comment #126; yeah, perfect. Because this person not having a job will SURELY stop them from stealing again. You asshat.

wow. stealing a shirt. what an idiot.

hey you tell em #172

#167 its an FML because he was an idiot fo shop liftin

I hope you got arrested you dirty bastard

Stealing. GOD. Just think about where that came from. Probably China in a sweatshop with child laborers is what. Stealing from that store is just like stealing money from the workers- whether they be underpaid, under aged, illegal, etc. If you want a damned shirt so badly make it yourself rather than cheating people of well earned money.

And not to mention- but WHY in the HELL would you even ADMIT to that while still in the store? Or try to suck up to someone?

You totally deserved it.

Lol,apparently FML is full of uptight high ciddity cunts. The guy shoplifted,so what? MORE POWER TO THEFT.

LOL, apparently FML is full of pathetic losers who think shoplifting makes them tough and cool.

#177, you obviously aren't grown up enough to understand how bad stealing is.
Only stupid, heartless, self centered, lowlifes steal because they have no idea what it does to people around them.

Stealing is like cheating on a college acceptance exam. Riding on the coattails of someone else will only get you so far. And riding on their coattails in general just leaves you still behind them.

There is no point.
Except to feed one's ignorant and self centered ways. Which is something that no one supports no matter how hard you try to debate about it.

why would you ever admit that?

oh poor, poor you.

I was shoplifting so when I talked to someone else, I automatically assumed they were stealing too, but it turns out they were the manager.

YDI

how many of you have NOT stolen music before?

OP... you are a worthless pathetic person, END OF STORY.

You are a dumbass.

Did you actually think people wouldn't say you deserved that? You're a moron.

wow
wow
YDI YDI YDI

.....that's why you don't steal. And that is ESPECIALLY why you don't admit to it. Jeez.

retard! you never admit to it, especially to a total and complete stranger! i hope your ass got fined so much!

YDI a million times, you thieving cunt. Get a fucking life.

You're looking for sympathy when you were the one shoplifting?

if you hadn't left the store yet with the shirt they can't arrest you

No pity for you what so ever.

the epicness of this fail is undescribable

You totally deserved this one you damn thief

I clicked YDI as soon as I saw shoplifting.

hahaha wow. how did you expect to get an ounce of sympathy out of this.

"I was at the mall shoplifting"
You say that like its normal. Who the hells goes to the mall to shoplift?
Stealing is stupid in general and you totally deserved it.

dipshit

your a fucking idiot

what the hell? that's why you don't steal.

yay everyone hates you :] bitch YDI

wow!!!
u totally deserved that!!!!

INSTANT fyl for the first 7 words. Idiot

Why the fuck would you admit to shoplifting. Idiot.

"Today I was being a thoughtless jackass and got caught. FML"

Boo fucking hoo. Did you expect to get any sympathy here?

uhh are we supposed to sympathize with you about that? you deserve it idiot.

AHAHA Laaamee
You fail at life.

YDI for being a pathetic thief

hahaha that's funny. everyone can screw off, everyone steals these days, whateverrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

hahaahahaaha dumb bitch

sometimes these ones are let through just so the dickweeds can see a thousand people commenting on what a brainless moron they are

I only steal the hearts of young ladies, but you my friend are a fucking idiot, common' your not supposed to agree, *Palms Face*

dumbass.. you deserved that one..

Way to go numbnuts.

i agree you do deserve it! if you steal shit. the one golden rule is never never admit it. even if the person seems "cool"
dumb ass

My IQ just dropped from reading your stupidity. Moron. YDI 100%.

I'm not sure what's worse - that you were shoplifting, or that you were stupid enough to admit to it while in the building. YDI.

#4--
It actually is possible that Winona Ryder "forgot" to pay for her stuff. My mom almost did that once when we were shopping XD We were at Target, and she started to walk past the cashiers to the door with the cart, and I was like, "...Mom? Forgetting something?" She felt so stupid XD
You totally deserved this, blovesg. Just pay for your crap.

Uh #210 - Everybody steals these days? Seriously? Anybody with an ounce of integrity will pay for their stuff.

Dude, you so deserve this. FYL that you don't have the honesty to pay for your shit.

You're an idiot.

Ehh, YDI for telling a random person ( which turned out to be the manager ) that you stole =/

what a f*cktard. seriously.

I use to be a loss prevention officer for a Nike store, I have done that a lot to shoplifters. You totally deserved EVERYTHING you got you moron.

First of all, lets just calm down. If this was the first time she was caught shoplifting she is not going to jail. She'll probably pay a fine and never be allowed in the story anymore.
Secondly, to the sender. You are still really stupid. Even if the person does look "cool" you should never admit to stealing. To anyone.

you're a fucking idiot, really? ..... really?

First words i saw: "I was at the mall shoplifting." You deserved that one.

FUCKTARD.

shoplifting?
get real.
ydi.

ECKS DEE

wow...no sympathy. you're a fuckin retard for shoplifting in the first place.

YOU ARE COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY RETARDED. PLEASE SHOOT YOURSELF IN THE FOOT.

rofl to #208

133: Fucking stupid explanation. Even if someone is poor, that doesn't mean they're justified to shoplift. Stores raise the price on stuff they sell to make up for what shoplifters take. So basically, people like YOU contribute to higher prices. Fuck you, and grow up. You can't steal your way to everything.

Yeah...shoplifting? Not such a smart idea.

Telling someone else? Not smart.

Telling the manager you shoplifted? Priceless.

There are some things money can buy. A brain isn't one of them.

Idiot.

...Dumb ass.

See this is why there's a system where we BUY things instead of STEAL them. You deserve the embarrassment and punishment, a million times over. Get a job, and if you already have one, use the money.

If you have no respect for property, you can't expect others to respect yours.

YDI Big-Time!

Karmaaaa. You'd pathetic.

HAHA RETARD

shoplifting's never cool.
And you're an idiot

Loved #236!

#233 was fun too :-]

#133 don't give him tips on how to friggin shoplift. Most people buy THEIR clothes so the people who don't should have to face the consequences. It's not that people are so poor they steal, it's that they have limited money or get addicted to it.
If people really don't want to spend money but wanna buy stuff they really only have two choices.
#1: buy it
#2 don't buy it

Or if the people who steal were smarter and just bought clothes and shiz at Markets for really cheap then they probably wouldn't get addicted to shoplifting in the first place

Also, #225, who said they were a chick and not a guy. lol

blah blah blah.
did you really think that all of these people who actually work for the money they use to BUY clothes would feel bad for you?

i guess obviously you aren't very intelligent though...

hahaha you're a dumbass!

Way to go. You deserved that 110% idiot.

You're a fucking retarded dumbass, and YDI 100%. I hope the store prosecutes to the fullest extent.

See my nick.

Wow... YDI, through and through.

Shoplifting is bad enough.

Telling someone is even dumber.

And telling the manager- you didn't see the name tag?

Come on man, you're doing it wrong.

#133 If someone steals to SURVIVE I can try to understand. But I'm talking about stealing food and stuff like that. Stuff you NEED.
Stealing just to look like everyone else? Grow up.
Doing stuff just because others also do it is just stupid. Live your own life.

I clicked YDI immediately on reading "shoplifting".

You are a dumbass.

What, shop-lifting and then admitting it to someone who just randomly came up to you? You utterly deserved that one.

Smooth move. Sounds like it was your first attempt at stealing? Let's hope its the last. Next one might land you in jail~

That'd be a fun living! Acting like a customer for a place you work at and asking others if they're shop-lifting just to see if they are. Sounds exciting, haha!

Uhh... slow?

"Today, I was at the mall shoplifting..." Stop. Who starts a sentence like that?
Shoplifting doesn't make you cool. I guess you didn't get the memo. I'm letting you know, for future reference. :)

So today I was murdering a guy with a baseball bat, and I got blood all over my nice clean pants. FML.

Probably should have noticed the name tag.

Why are you shoplifting, idiot? Get a job.

'tard.

whoever compares stealing clothes from a store where the people who work there probably get paid 8 bucks an hour to stealing music from artists who probably make over 300k a year is a moron

u idiot

you totally deserved that one dumbass, first off for shoplifting second of all for admiting it to a complete stranger

and #133 there is NO justifiable reason for shoplifting ok. its just called im lazy and want somebodys fuckin hand outs. it is not impossible to find a job. so find it. work it. EARN your money and then go fucking spend it.

Shoplifting makes you an automatic failure. Especially if you think you'd find pity here.

wow i hope you got huge fines for stealing. you're an asswhipe. you think you're above the law? everyone else has to pay for shit.. you are no exception. i have no respect for you. get a job.

that's a very young manager ...

you're a fucking retard im glad u got caught we dont need shit like that in america

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA...!!

THERE'S NO WAY YOU COULD HAVE *NOT* DESERVED THIS. XD

Man, u really think you're cool for stealing? tard

No FYL, Fuck YOU.

Lmao, dumbass.

"today, i was at the mall shoplifting..." wtf man, wtf?

i used to work in retail and HATE people like you. go get a job you lazy lowlife

Wow, seriously?
"Today, I was at the mall shoplifting"...
You said that so casually, as if it's a normal daily routine for *everybody*.
Though, I guess apparently it is for YOU.
You deserve everything you got, douchebag.

ur an assholeee

ur an assholeee

dumbass

yeah, I have no idea ytf you would admit it, to anyone but ur other dumb friends, alot of ppl have said things like stealing is dumb, but not all stealing is wrong ie robin hood ( I know its dumb but w/e) anyway ydi your retarded for telling some random ppl

yeah, I have no idea ytf you would admit it, to anyone but ur other dumb friends, alot of ppl have said things like stealing is dumb, but not all stealing is wrong ie robin hood ( I know its dumb but w/e) anyway ydi your retarded for telling some random ppl

people are so mean and judgemental on these comments damn.

i got caught once after a year of serial shoplifting by an undercover agent. and my mom was with me at the time. i stole something worth $3.99.

shoplifting doesn't mean you're stupid (i have a good gpa, hold down a job and live on my own), it just means you made a bad decision. like everyone does from time to time.

so i agree your life is fucked!

"today i was at the mall shoplifting..."
that is sad.

hahahaha

g freaking g

you are a complete idiot

that sucks, wonder what would have happened if you said no

nice job you thief fuck

never again?

damn.. I wanna be that manager

you disgust me! stealing is low.. you are nothing more than pond scum now... congrats on being a fuck-up with no aspirations in life but to grow up and breed more fuck-ups.. go get an education , so you can realize how ignorant and lacking you are... you deserve to be caught.. i hope you never mate with anybody, because you will only breed stupidity and ignorance...i would eliminate you if i had the power... i agree wholeheartedly with #179... ask yourself... do you deserve to live and taint this world?

I work LP for a store you piece of shit skank, get a fucking job.

Clicked YDI when I saw the first line: I was at the mall shoplifting.

That's what you get for shoplifting.

You deserve that so much you f-u-c-k-i-n-g thief!
Your life is @#$%ed? No, it's your choice to steal you dumb@ss.

FYL for being a complete cockstain nd stealing things in the 1st place

wow. u sound like a pro at being a clepto. next time, buy the item instead of feeling like an ass admitting to stealing them to the MANAGER! n getting thrown out in front of everybody. you never know who might be watching.

Wait so...one question. When did Shoplifting ever register as cool and attractive? It's kind of a sign that you're a poor fucking loser who needs a life...
Or maybe that's just me who thinks that?

Shoplifting is for scummy dirtbags. You fucking suck!

you're a dumbass. who goes to a mall just to shoplift, brags about it to a girl in a store you are stealing from, and whines about it on line.

go play in traffic.

you where in a store which you were stealing, and someone asked you if you were stealing, so you decided to tell them because they "looked cool"? holy shit. i feel sorry for anyone related to you.

so...have you ever heard of alarm tags?
even if the person wasn't the manager you would have been caught for steeling it when the alarm went off!

you are an idiot. first of all, if youre stealing something, others shouldnt be able to see it in your bag unless you are asking to get caught. and two, the only way you can get caught stealing (at least where i live) is having an associate see you taking something from the store. i dont give a fuck whos around me when im shoplifting, i would never admit to a complete stranger that i stole something, especially since youre still in that store.

Rofl. It's karma.

i hate thieves and that was such a fail lmao

THIEF.

"Today, I was at the mall shoplifting..." like you were just taking a walk in the park. I hope your house is burglarized while you're out stealing.

Hahaha thats funny..YDI

there once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he was eating his shoe. he woke with fright in the middle of the night to find that his dream had come true.

#303, I completely agree
if your stealing, for whatever reason, you deserved it
any FML that starts "Today, I was at the mall shoplifting..." is not a good FML, if you were seriously breaking the law like that and you were that stupid to admit it to the manager, the you most certainly deserved that
I'm also surprised this made it in, must not have been many FMLs submitted that day i guess...

DO A BARREL ROLL

YDI for shoplifting.

and LOL, that manager is freakin awesome ;o

ydii for steealliing !

WOW! dumbass!

smooth move...

WOW ok its one thing that you were shoplifting, lots of teens (i assume your a teenager, if not hmmm more problems) do it, especially for alcohol but telling someone that you don't know that your shoplifting....thats like the ultimate Fuck me I'm an idiot moment. I've been in those but not this one haha, I feel bad for you but you had it comin' and you know it.

-clap, clap clap-
Great job, Smarty Pants. Way to give yourself away, buttknock.
No offense, but that was one of the stupidest things that you could have done. Acctually, offense. You where shoplifting, God, and you told someone you DO NOT KNOW that you where!!!!! Smooth move.

#313, i doubt that you're a smarty pants either considering that you use the word buttknock, you cannot spell "actually", and you can't spell "were". But i do agree with your basic gist.

And you continue your stupidity by posting about it. I hope you can't breed.

"Today, I was at the mall shoplifting..."
I just can't tell why everything ended up going down hill.
High Five! YDI

You totally deserved that you thieving dumb ass

Idiot

Lol, total YDI.

I don't think you deserved it.
People shoplift, it's no big deal.

You fucked up by trying to sound cool.

Now you know better.

ROFLMAO
Jackass!
YDI

Wow your dumn. You dont talk to random people like that you never know. And know you do lol.

lol learn to shoplift. Not only are you doing something immoral, but you're doing it badly. Fail.

I hope you got charged for that you POS

YDI you dumbass, that girl is bamfff

Learn how to steal next time!.
I mean you're an thieving idiot.

YDI completely, you little thief. I hope you had the police called on you.

shouldn't you be in jail instead of writing FML's

FAKE!

Who admits to shoplifting in any situation?! Even on this website?! This has to be the stupidest girl I've never met...

I fuckin hate how people like u (op) use this site to bitch about something bad happening to you when you do something wrong like cheating or shoplifting. That's not fml that's called justice. But self-sorry dipshits like you can't seem to grasp that concept....

Ydi beeeeeee-itch!!!

wow YDI big time + why would u shoplift

HAHA you idiot! good for them catching your stupid ass.

This is why public school looks bad

Freakin basterd!!! Criminal! U totally deserved that.

1 word IDIOT.

Forget being stupid, it is overly apparent that you excel at that. The fact that you shoplift in my mind makes you roughly equal to the bird shit on the back of my car. In other words, if you were to...say...die...I wouldn't care. In fact, I'd be happy that one more person who is a drain on society is gone, and dance on your grave. I despise people who steal, try working hard and achieving things. I don't make $300,000 a year by being a lazy criminal who is content stealing jeans as opposed to bettering himself. Go get a life...or end it, IDC YDI

Freely confessing you stole something, to anyone exept God
FAIL

Ur a total asshole why the he'll would u shoplift? U deserve to be jailed motherf*cker

Asshole

YOU ARE A MORON
YDI BIG TIME!!!

why were u shoplifting?

Retarded people shouldn't attempt to steal.

Ahahahahaha your f*cking retarted :)

Ok first ur a plain moron. First of all managers wear this really cool new invention called a NAMETAG. Ur a idiot for not noticeing that

YDI for shop lifting . Are u that poor ?

your dumb

ur a freakin idiot

Hope u go to jail one day.

Crime doesn't pay.

Your a dumb fuck

DUMBass!

"She looked pretty cool, so i asked her if she stole those jeans she was wearing". Your an absolutely fail shoplifter dude.
And might i add, you are a complete retard.

http://randazza.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/facepalm.jpg

wow, clever

Their

There you go, bitch.

Get a job like the restvof us. And second off if u are going to steal don't admit it to a total stranger in the store u are stealing in. No wonder u stole, u are a complete idoit!

You high? Or are you just effin stupid?

Really? You shoplift from a store, get caught for trying to act cool (because crime is ULTRA COOL MAAAAN) and ending up doing something unbelievably stupid... and expect sympathy? What the hell?

Maybe, instead of stealing, you could try for a job. This might end up on your records, though... good luck with that.

YDI. Idiot.

How could you even post this as an FML?
Once shoplifting comes into play, you know you deserved it 100%.

Dumbasses like you don't deserve to be let out of the house. How can you pull shit like this when even 15 year olds are getting 6-day a week, 6-8 hours a day summer jobs to pay for the stuff they want?

I think once the manager calls your mother, she should hook you up with a job like that and teach you how to get stuff the right way.

It was all down hill from 'Today, I was at the mall SHOPLIFTING'

I hope u get raped in jail, asshole!!

Yeah that's sad that you two are about the same age and you're shoplifting while she is already earning her living as a manager.

haha FAIL!

I can't criticize you for shoplifting because I've done it before (I am ashamed of it and will never do it again) but honestly, why would you fucking tell some random person you did it? Fuckk.

Why the hell did you tell us al you shoplifted

U so f-ing diserved it!!! LOL but it is still really funny

Well that is what you get for shoplifting, Winona Ryder!

YDI for shoplifting!

Obviously, YDI fer stealinn'.

Fuck you for stealing. Please die.

YDI for eating the poor mans waffles!

Get a job dipshit!
want something so bad earn money like the rest of us!

You are a F*ing thief. learn to not steal and then you can talk. I hate bastards like you

who cares if she steals its her risk not yours & what if she didnt have the money ? wow if you people dont like stealing then do dont do it , worry about you !

Dumbass what in the hell where u thinkin

FAKE

how can u STILL not be in jail?

if ur gunna do it (which u shudnt)
DONT TELL ANYONE IDIOT!

U suck!

don't steal. the end.

how can u say the phrase "I was shoplifting" on this site and expect people to say "I agree, your life sucks"?
Idiot....
Drop the soap, You'd deserve that too

I hope u go to prizon. get a job u fucking waste of space!! I hate people like you with a passion. fucking useless mother fucker do us a favour and die. prick.

YDI. Busted poor guy!

BUSED!! YDI!!

I mean busted*

broke bastard

I'm wondering if this ever even happened. I mean, what person is THIS stupid? Shoplifting, admitting shoplifting to a random person, and then posting it on this site, expecting everyone to feel sorry for you? I'm wondering if the OP just made this story up for the reactions. If not, then yes, she is an uneducated, retarded cunt.

you shouldnt have stole anything its your fault

Shoplifting is stealing, YDI

disgusted, shop lifting get a life!

*facepalm* Tell me how this is an FML. YDI plain and simple. I've known not to shoplift since I was 5 and your probably older than that. And you thought a lady would be cool for shoplifting and because she seemed cool you decide to tell her you shoplifted? Way to add epic fail points.

You are a worthless fuck OP. Go die,

that's a little harsh

get a jod deadbeat

Dee-de-dee! you deserve that shit cock stain quit being a fucking klepto.

YDI you fugging idiot! try not shoplifting next time, asshole.

fucktard.... never say thatvstupid your fault bitch

That started out wrong. Why the hell are you shoplifting asshole?

Dude, if you're going to do it, do it right! I should know, I used to be a shoplifter. Never got caught.