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Today, a cat came up to me on the pavement so I petted it a little. An elderly man rode past on his bicycle and shouted "I'd like to stroke your pussy too!" FML

#6367890 — 11/19/2009 at 12:20pm
by pussystroker — intimacy
I agree, your life sucks (10414)
You totally deserve it (1506)

omg I peeed my pants I was laughing so hard

#77 - 02/10/2010 at 2:19am - hershey098

Epicly awesome

#2 - 11/19/2009 at 5:16pm - Tarak

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHA

#3 - 11/19/2009 at 5:17pm - 123e3

OMG! I DIED when I read this, bwahaha! Thank you for the laugh!

#4 - 11/19/2009 at 5:21pm - Bloodknight

LOL!

#5 - 11/19/2009 at 5:27pm - m3aghan

lolz, that would be awesome. I don't see how this is an FML.

#6 - 11/19/2009 at 5:29pm - picturetaker

Coolest old man EVER!

#7 - 11/19/2009 at 5:29pm - Erindub

Hahaha, awesome! Older people always come out with hilarious comments.

#8 - 11/19/2009 at 5:33pm - crazyarsedfly

Sorry, that was you?
Oops.

#9 - 11/19/2009 at 5:41pm - ohmygoodnex

lol that's soo creepy but funny at the same time. but it's not really a fml it's just a old man joking around

#10 - 11/19/2009 at 5:43pm - lilkim222

old people say the funniest things

#11 - 11/19/2009 at 5:46pm - wrigglezeus

So you dropped your knickers and ran down the street after him yelling, "Come back! I'll let you!"


(sorry if it's a repeat.)

#12 - 11/19/2009 at 5:48pm - perdix

I hate old people. =\

#13 - 11/19/2009 at 5:58pm - allie2590

I Know how you feel old people are the most annoying thing ever i hate them so much all of them but you gotta give this old timer props

#24 - 11/19/2009 at 7:15pm - spendmoneyon420

I woulda yelled TOO BAD IM NOT A CHICK DUMB ASS he woulda been like fuck

#14 - 11/19/2009 at 6:01pm - Rico5037

Oh my god!!!!

#15 - 11/19/2009 at 6:07pm - loveyahun

YDI for playing with your pussy in public!

#16 - 11/19/2009 at 6:18pm - _Paul_88

Never mind, I read that too fast. I thought you said, "in pubic."

My mistake.

#19 - 11/19/2009 at 6:25pm - perdix

Paul, it wasn't even her own pussy it was someone elses!

#17 - 11/19/2009 at 6:22pm - Erindub

Was he hot? Cause if he was, no FML.

#18 - 11/19/2009 at 6:24pm - BigK_Diet_Cola

I usually invite those dudes to suck my dick. The kind that yell that stuff are usually the same kind that would never admit they'd be up for cocksucking.

#20 - 11/19/2009 at 6:34pm - mercyFML

So THAT's how you hook up with them....

#43 - 11/20/2009 at 5:07pm - kukopia

yep. Now slide that sasshole around my shaft and make a wish, sailor. *wink*

#50 - 11/21/2009 at 12:23am - mercyFML

omg ewww wht a fuckin perv.

#21 - 11/19/2009 at 6:43pm - illy88

I wanna say YDI in a good way, but if you can't see the humor in it then maybe not.

#23 - 11/19/2009 at 7:02pm - Eelusive

witty perverted old people never get old

#25 - 11/19/2009 at 7:48pm - FederalAgent

lol i lovee that dudee!! :D

#27 - 11/19/2009 at 8:59pm - xoluvinshayxo

...Perdix lives in the UK?!?!?!

#28 - 11/19/2009 at 9:36pm - ScaryyMary

No, I just used "knickers" 'cause I saw the story was from there. I wouldn't mind visiting there because of a certain frequent FML contributor ;)

#30 - 11/19/2009 at 9:53pm - perdix

Who's that

#40 - 11/20/2009 at 9:25am - HarperGirl

Just keep your eyes open. We comment back and forth quite often.

#49 - 11/20/2009 at 11:57pm - perdix

you actually replied to me? i love your comments but i feel kinda shy online at times

#52 - 11/22/2009 at 12:17am - HarperGirl

perdix is a funny bitch! haha he's the only one i actually look for, he's never said anything that wasn't funny :D

#74 - 02/01/2010 at 10:16pm - Puls3ofth3maggot

lmaooooooo whatttt a pervvvvvvv!

#29 - 11/19/2009 at 9:42pm - ipownyew234

too easy

#34 - 11/20/2009 at 2:13am - Andyangels27

LOL! that's too awesome to be a FML.

#35 - 11/20/2009 at 3:20am - Voids

yumerz •.•

#36 - 11/20/2009 at 5:43am - LeoV

shhh...that was me dressed like an old man lmao

#37 - 11/20/2009 at 6:46am - reecescuphoe

Shit I would too

#38 - 11/20/2009 at 7:02am - HXCxSceneKidx

What a sick old man.

#39 - 11/20/2009 at 7:36am - HyperactiveJer

I can't wait to be old so i can get awy with anything XD

#41 - 11/20/2009 at 9:40am - Thhe

The old guy got it from Johnny Carson.

#42 - 11/20/2009 at 2:03pm - kukopia

what's wrong with that?

#44 - 11/20/2009 at 5:21pm - saculmot

hahahahahahahaha.
if it's a true story, it's a classic.

#45 - 11/20/2009 at 5:26pm - Spastro

that's just funny as hell!! YDI for not being able to laugh at life

#46 - 11/20/2009 at 6:57pm - LaughAtLaugh

nice

#47 - 11/20/2009 at 7:12pm - tony91

wow, that man is full of win!

#48 - 11/20/2009 at 7:20pm - Lucky2u

I hate old people

#51 - 11/21/2009 at 2:03pm - tropicthunder

Roflmao

#53 - 11/22/2009 at 9:29am - jmanjonEs

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

#54 - 11/23/2009 at 2:27pm - Ariel17

AHAHAHAHAH WTF damn i would kill myself if that happened to me

#55 - 11/25/2009 at 11:45pm - XCAILIExCURSEDX

bahahahahahaha thats amazing!!

#56 - 11/26/2009 at 1:03am - lvjordanln

omg is your name Olivia Jordan????

#72 - 01/28/2010 at 7:49pm - peacelove1297

thats what they call a PEDALfile (: (hahah like a bikee )

#57 - 11/27/2009 at 11:03pm - BaBiiSpAnKy821

totally just died. thats great!! i dont see how this is an fml tho, if that had happened to me id still be laughing. too funny.

#58 - 11/29/2009 at 7:37pm - emelvin

epic! that would have made my day. lmfao

#59 - 12/04/2009 at 8:29pm - Eveline_Roze

You should have yelled after him, "What pussy?"
He'd be like Oh SHIT SHES A FUCKING TRANS, I DUN WAN HER DICK!

#60 - 12/05/2009 at 2:42pm - katiewubsmusic

Hahahahahaha.

#61 - 12/05/2009 at 7:40pm - Jonomazin

This upsets me. Most stray cats almost always run away when they see people..unless its like a neighbors cat or one you're very familiar with..you see Im trying to give yu the benefit of the doubt here..Ugh. This story seems too perfectly put together just to be able to throw the "stroke your pussy" thing in there. An on the off chance that this is actually true, then YDI for liking cats.

#62 - 12/10/2009 at 12:09am - MangeMoi

You're a bad person and you should feel bad.

#67 - 12/27/2009 at 8:23pm - Cloudbush

then say, "Yea? come here!" then kick his balls

#63 - 12/16/2009 at 3:19pm - burgydagamer

smooth move by him. lol jk. that's kinda nasty

#64 - 12/21/2009 at 12:40am - Oven

that's a freakin epic FML
FYL

#65 - 12/22/2009 at 12:29am - soffikkira

lol i want to met that guy and shake his hand haa

#66 - 12/26/2009 at 5:47pm - davids123

that sounds like something my grandpa would say (that is he would if I could talk to him) apparently my parents think that some of the coments heade to the female cashier at the supermarket were too racy for me

#68 - 12/31/2009 at 12:27am - Danceswithsmurfs

you know, he's probably been waiting his whole life to say that to someone.
you just gave him the time of his life. feel happy! :)

#69 - 01/08/2010 at 6:40am - delfoxio

bwhaahahahahah that's funny

#70 - 01/15/2010 at 11:28pm - omgmorganomg

ahahahahahah thats so funny

#71 - 01/18/2010 at 12:25am - BabyC_2011

that's funny

#73 - 01/31/2010 at 12:47am - stewie117

OMG PUSSY.

I LIKE A LONG HAIRED THICK REDBONE
OPEN UP HER LEGGSS GON' GET ME ON HER PUSSY

#75 - 02/03/2010 at 1:32am - Americunt

lmfai

#76 - 02/03/2010 at 1:59am - mustang91

wut an old perv lol

#78 - 03/01/2010 at 12:26am - Bonita4301

ydi for saying petted.

#79 - 03/01/2010 at 5:06am - cartesianlogic

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